The soul cannot forgive until it
is restored to wholeness and health.
In the absence of love - how can one forgive?

With an abundance of love, starting with one's self,
forgiveness becomes a viable opportunity.
-Nancy Richards

Thursday, February 19, 2009

The Ten People I Couldn't Have Healed Without

1. My dad (he died when I was nine): who bestowed upon me his loving parental heart in an otherwise barren childhood. His unconditional love planted the seeds that I would later dig up and use to internalize self-love.

2. My aunt Julie (Mom's sister): who was/is the closest thing I've had to a nurturing mother. She has stood by me (amidst great external opposition) my entire life, including during my fourteen year estrangement from my entire family of origin. Her support made the difference between my emotional survival and falling into the abyss. I love her!

3. My friend Nina: who was the first person to listen to me about my abuse. And who continues to "be there" for me no matter what. I'll be forever grateful to her and for her!

4. An unnamed bad relationship: who taught me that I can learn and grow even from the bad stuff!

5. My gentleman friend Bill, who stuck with me while I worked through all the childhood stuff that affects my relationships. What an amazing blessing he is!

6. & 7. My daughters: who gave me the joy of finally experiencing a loving mother-daughter bond.

8. A really great therapist: who helped me tear down my old emotional construction and rebuild a healthy new emotional foundation.

9. Rev. Dr. Marie M. Fortune, founder of the Faith Trust Institite; the first person (and for many years the only person) from the religious community who told me that I didn't have to forgive. She gave me the freedom to focus on my own well-being and to nurse myself back to emotional health; which sent me on a healing journey that eventually (and ironically) freed me to forgive.

10. Last - but not least - me: for my courage, strength, determination, self-love and self-respect.

6 comments:

mile191 said...

this is a beautiful post. thanks for sharing. love it. and needed it. so much.

healandforgive said...

You're Welcome!

Thank YOU!

Marj aka Thriver said...

What a great idea ofr a post and what a great list. I'm so glad you included yourself in there, Nancy.

healandforgive said...

Thanks Marj!

Michele Rosenthal said...

I love the idea of thinking of the people who stood beside us! I just recently did this; my list is not so long. I'm thinking I ought to look more closely....

healandforgive said...

Thanks Michelle! Mine wasn't quiet so long to begin with either. I started out with six and left it as a draft to give myself time to really think about it.