tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557084346768128841.post7618441312199480134..comments2023-05-25T08:51:36.759-07:00Comments on Heal and Forgive: Life's Passages - Transition to Adulthood -Becoming Un-EnmeshedAbuseAndForgivenesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09738069361076986611noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557084346768128841.post-10860694402593404472009-05-30T07:21:59.851-07:002009-05-30T07:21:59.851-07:00Hi MM,
How sad when we have to mother our mother...Hi MM, <br /><br />How sad when we have to mother our mothers rather than the other way around. <br /><br />Learning to mother myself without a role-model was a huge under-taking.<br /><br />Interesting that you brought up parenting. I just posted something I was writing on parenting when I received your comment. <br /><br />Thanks again for sharing!AbuseAndForgivenesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09738069361076986611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557084346768128841.post-38002289971585982092009-05-30T05:17:53.259-07:002009-05-30T05:17:53.259-07:00wow, another wonderful post. i too feel like i had...wow, another wonderful post. i too feel like i had to go through detaching from enmeshment from my mother. for me this was especially in relinquishing my parental and companion roles with her (my father was the abuser in the family, she had turned to the children to meet her emotional needs for companionship and parental guidance). i had to encourage her to build her own supportive relationships and that it was time for me to live my own life and she could do this on her own. i enjoyed the power i had as her "parent" but it wasn't good for either of us (i had no mother for one thing).<br /><br />i really appreciate this post also because it brings up the issues i'm going through now as a parent facing my own daughter's beginnings of independence (toddlerhood). i'm striving to be conscious of my past relationship with my mother, not wanting to repeat her mistakes, and trying to be a securely attached parent who is comfortable enough to let her do her own thing, yet still feel loved for who she is separate from me. and especially not to use her to meet my needs! thanks!!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557084346768128841.post-85309159153495498232009-05-15T18:39:00.000-07:002009-05-15T18:39:00.000-07:00Hi Marj,
What a great point. I agree that enmes...Hi Marj, <br /><br />What a great point. I agree that enmeshment is a HUGE survivor issue. The added dimensions involved with twin issues are mind-boggling. Kudos for achieving a very difficult task!AbuseAndForgivenesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09738069361076986611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557084346768128841.post-4089446653884907752009-05-15T17:13:00.000-07:002009-05-15T17:13:00.000-07:00I think this is a HUGE survivor topic, but it does...I think this is a HUGE survivor topic, but it doesn't get talked about much. I really had to work hard to end the enmeshment with my sister. It was especially difficult because she helped me survive...and she's my identical twin.Marj aka Thriverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825698906631474866noreply@blogger.com